Choices
by taka003
Summary: Hakkai makes a bold move and is rewarded for his effort. SanzoXHakkai
1. Chapter 1

Gojyo stepped in front of Sanzo but the priest fell anyway. His hand crushed an already smashed glass embedding the shards. I watched as he tried to shake it off and turned to Gojyo. "Finish this kappa." He headed upstairs and I followed him after I made sure Gojyo had things under control. My friend was grinning as he charged into the fray.

I opened the door to the monk's room. I heard the water running and leaned against the bathroom door frame. "Sanzo?" He looked up. "May I help you with that?"

"Might as well." He snapped.

I went to my bag and brought back tweezers and peroxide. "You might want to remove your robe so it doesn't get bloody."

"Right" He struggled one handedly with the sash. "Fuck" he looked up at me.

I stepped closer and untied the knot, he tried to pull away, but I gave him a stern look. He allowed me to help him shrug out of the garment. "You know Sanzo your leather is going to have to come off too."

"Go ahead" He grunted.

I slid the leather down his arm and tried to be gentle pulling it over his palm. He hissed as the tight material scrapped over his bleeding flesh. "Sorry"

"It's fine." He sat down placing his hand on the table. "Go ahead Doc poke away."

I laughed and took my seat. "Now do try to hold still." I held his hand in both of mine examining it. "Looks like nothing went too deep and by washing it the smaller shards were dislodged. Ready?" I looked up into his eyes.

"Yeah get on with it." He grumbled.

"Yes Sanzo." I bent my head and began plucking out the remaining shards.

"What was the fight over this time?" I tried to distract him from my prodding.

"God damned kappa messing with some man's woman. I happened to be too close and got dragged in to the mess." He winced as I pulled a large piece from deep in his palm.

"I have some whiskey if that will help." I stood and brought a bottle and glass.

"Umph" He skipped the glass and took a long pull of the fiery liquid. "Good"

"Yes, I found it in the last town." I gave him a small smile.

"I see and you were planning on keeping it for yourself?" He put his hand back down, but not on the table as before but in mine. Sanzo's skin was warm, but rough on his palm where he held the gun. His thumb was calloused from pulling the hammer back so often as he threatened the others into silence.

"No, I had intended to share it with a friend." He took another long drink, cocked an eyebrow at being referred to as friend and then looked me in the eyes. "Does it hurt that much Sanzo?"

"You know I've had worse, you've seen me all mangled and bloody." He shrugged and took another sip. "This stuff is really good." His cheeks took on a pink hue.

"If you drink too much it will thin the blood." I removed the last of the shards and placed the tweezers on the table. He had settled back in his chair and watched me with those beautiful eyes.

"Too late I already had quite a few down stairs." He stood up and walked to the bed. If someone didn't know Sanzo they would not think he was intoxicated, but I did know him and he was well on his way to a vicious hangover.

"Sanzo would you like me to get you some water and possibly some aspirin?" I sat next to him on the bed, close enough to catch a smell of his shampoo.

"I'm fine I said, just finish with me alright." He flopped back and held out his hand. "Seal it up Hakkai."

I gathered a small amount of healing chi and sent it in to Sanzo's hand. The wounds healed cleanly and I wiped away any remaining spots of blood. "All fixed." I smiled down at him.

"Too bad you can't do that for people's hearts." He said cryptically as he covered his eyes with his arm.

"Yes, it would make life for a few of us a lot easier." I tucked my leg under me so I could sit on the bed and watch Sanzo. We didn't get a lot of time alone and I was going to savor it.

"Umpf." He grunted. "Hold still, you're making me dizzy."

"That would be the whiskey." I patted his shoulder and chuckled. Sometimes Sanzo surprised me with his humor, but what really shocked me was his hand reaching up and grabbing mine. I turned back to look into his eyes. "Sanzo?"

"Yes" His expression didn't change, but his grip did.

"Are you unwell?" His gaze made me feel the tingle that has been nagging at pit of my stomach for sometime.

"Not any more than you are." Sanzo intertwined his fingers in mine and put them over his heart. "Fix it."

"You sure you are alright?" I was not quite sure what he wanted me to fix, but I had an idea. I moved my free hand to cover our joined ones. "I can't fix it Sanzo, you know that."

"I know." He sat up and leaned against the wall, pulling me with him. He tugged and I landed next to him on my side. "But you can ease it a little."

"I don't think you want me to do that." I was torn between taking him in my arms and trying to soothe him or walking away so I wouldn't have to fix my own heart, I hesitated and waited for Sanzo.

"Maybe, but whatever I don't care." He shifted his lean body closer to mine.

I could feel his heat penetrating my shirt and I took a deep breath. "You do care or else you wouldn't have asked me to help you."

He let go of my hand and pushed away. "I don't need help from anyone." He snapped at me.

"Sorry, I know how strong you are." I shifted to my knees and pressed my hand back to his chest. "Maybe I could send a little chi to your heart and help break down the wall that prevents you from healing."

"Oh, like your wall is any easier to get through." He raised his eyebrow and gave me the look that makes my throat dry and my heart jump.

I lay down on the bed and faced him. I never know how far I can push Sanzo before he gets angry and lashes out. "So very true." I noticed how he moved slightly closer. "But I need my walls to stay sane, to keep the beast at bay."

"Exactly." He tapped me on the forehead.

"And what beast do you keep under control?" I rested my head on my folded arm and gazed up at him.

"Nothing I can't handle." He rolled over and picked up the bottle. "Want some?"

"I suggest that you don't drink any more or else tomorrow may be difficult." I followed the bottle with my eyes as it traveled to his lips.

"Looks like you would like a little." He smirked.

"It looks like you are intoxicated and I should leave so you can sleep it off." I began to rise, but Sanzo pinned me down.

"Stop your shit Hakkai. You know and I know what we both want." He looked down at me.

"I'm sure I don't." I wanted to fight him off, but my body had already begun to betray me.

"You're an intelligent man Hakkai figure it out, your body already has." He pressed his ass against my embarrassing erection.

"But as you have said before, the body is weak and knows only instinct." I bit my lip to prevent my hips from pushing up into the inviting warmth.

"True, but sometimes it is wiser in its base ways than the head." He rotated his hips and ground into me making the offer quite clear.

"Ah, yes well…sorry. I really should go Sanzo. It's obvious…I'm having control issues." I had to get out from under him or I may seriously loose it.

He ran his hands down my chest and across my stomach. "I can tell."

"Sanzo, you are drunk and talking nonsense. I'm going to go before I do something we might regret." I pushed him off me and stood up. I realized I was breathing hard and I tried to still my pulse.

He lay back on the bed and gave me a piercing look. "So you admit something could happen between us Hakkai?"

"Yes….I …no it wouldn't be wise." I opened the door and stepped into the hall. "I'm sorry Sanzo."

"Whatever."

I shut the door and returned to my room. I threw myself on the bed and slammed by fist into the pillows. "You are a damn fool Cho Hakkai, a damn fool and a coward."

Two weeks after our conversation I knew I had to confront the monk. He had not spoken to me the entire time except to tell me to stop in the next town and warn me of danger. I had plenty of time to think about what had transpired between us and I was heartsick over my reaction. The pass was flooded and we would be staying put for a least another day in the current town. So I plucked up my nerve and decided after dinner would be the right time. I took a shower, dressed in jeans and a decent shirt. I found the correct room and stood looking at the number painted on it. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. "Sanzo, I need to speak with you."

He opened the door in nothing more than a towel. "What the hell do you want Hakkai?"

"I had hoped to make things right between us; the other two are starting to worry." I leaned on the door jam and tried not to stare at his chest.

"Let them, I really don't have anything to say to you." He turned and I grabbed his shoulder.

"Then just listen." I entered the room and locked the door behind me.

"Fine, but let me put some pants on." When he returned from the bath room he had on a pair of his tight black jeans. He sat down on the bed and waited for me to begin.

I had to look somewhere other than his body or I'm sure this wouldn't end well. "Sanzo, I apologize for my actions. I have been thinking and realized that I was being a coward, I was afraid of letting myself feel again. I also came to the conclusion that even though you were intoxicated, you bared yourself to me and I rejected you. I was too concerned about keeping myself safe and didn't pay any attention to your words. I realize now how much courage it took for you to express yourself the way you did." I sat down on the bed, far enough away that if he decided to shoot me I might be able to doge it.

"If you came here just to soothe your wounded pride, then forget it you might as well leave now. I don't want to hear how sorry you are. I defiantly don't want to hear how you plan to make it up to me. I know you Hakkai, you won't be happy until you do, but I don't care." He stood up and crossed to the window. Taking a cigarette off the ledge he lit up and stared out into the evening sky.

"Alright, then I won't tell you how much I regretted walking out that night. I wanted to stay a show you exactly how much I wanted you. I have wanted you since the time you chanted those words at the site of my sister's death" I was standing behind him and I could see his reflection in the glass. He had a look in his eyes that was hard to read, somewhere between anger and need. I took the stick from his fingers, took a drag and then snuffed it out.

He turned around. I couldn't tell if he wanted to kill me or kiss me. Sanzo reached around the back of my neck and took a handful of hair. Ripples of pleasure ran from where his fingers touched me all the way down my spine and I shivered.

"I don't want you, now get out." Sanzo tightened his grip and then pushed me away. "I made a mistake trusting you with my feelings."

I tried not to stumble. "No Sanzo, you didn't make a mistake." I moved back toward him and luckily I was fast enough to catch his fist as he swung at me. I pinned both his hands behind his back and he was forced to press his bare chest against me.

"You better fucking let me go." He snarled. My monk was beautiful even in his anger.

"Not this time Sanzo." I gave him a serious look as I guided him backward toward the bed. I let go of his arms and shoved him.

He reached for his gun and swore. "You are lucky my gun is in my robe, it gives you one chance to make me change my mind about killing you."

"That was what I was trying to do, stop being so stubborn." I straddled his hips and pinned his arms before he could try and hit me again. "I guess I'll just have to show you." I crushed my lips to his and felt him go ridged. He bit my lip hard and I tasted blood. I sat back and wiped it away with the back of my hand.

"Idiot. I always knew you would resort to violence to get what you wanted" He wiggled out from under me and picked up the Smith & Wesson from the table. "You think I'm going to be that easy, I won't succumb to your charms. I'm not your little kappa."

"I have no illusions that you are, he is much more agreeable." I knelt on the bed and faced Sanzo. He pushed the muzzle into my chest and pulled back the hammer. "Go ahead Sanzo."

"I should, it will put you out of your misery."

I could feel the cool metal dig into my skin as I was forced to my back. "I tried to get you to do that four years ago, but you insisted that I live."

"You are so fucking pathetic. You have no idea what you're playing at." He sneered at me, his eyes cold. "I made one attempt at being open; actually asking for what I want and you destroyed it with your stupidity."

He pulled the trigger, the sound was deafening. I felt the bullet rip a path through my chest as it lodged into the bed. "Awwgh" I grunted at the pain. With my ears ringing, I was barely able to look down at the pool of blood that was now spreading. I lay back, knowing my lung had collapsed. I gazed up at Sanzo and he had a look of horror in his eyes.

"Hakkai…I" He looked toward the door.

The last thing I saw was a flash of red and the sensation of being lifted.

I assumed I was really dead this time. When I cracked open my good eye I saw swirls of bright color. The surface I was laying on was soft and cool and the air smelled of exotic teas and spices. I tried to sit up, but found myself bound at the wrists and waist. "Ex…excuse me" my voice was raspy and I cleared my throat. "Hello?"

"Ah, my sleeping beauty awakes." A female voice, soft and low came from the left.

I waited until she came into my line of sight. "Why am I bound?"

"You are quite a fighter. I had to stop you from pulling out the tubes." She was about my age and very beautiful.

"I'm terribly sorry miss." She untied my bonds. "May I have some water?"

"You are such a gentleman." She helped me drink the cool water. "Better?"

"Yes, where am I?" I was able to sit up this time.

"You, my handsome patient are at my home; it also serves as the local hospital." She smiled. "You were a mess when you came in, but you should be alright now. I did have to take your limiters off though, you would have died otherwise."

Hakkai looked at her horrified. "I…you shouldn't have done that, I didn't hurt you did I?" I touched my limiters, just to make sure they were tight.

"Don't worry, your friend stayed with me and helped." She moved around the room then checked on the bandages.

"I hope my friend didn't cause you too much trouble, he is a terrible flirt." I gave her a small smile.

"He was no trouble at all. In fact he helped me hold you as took the bullet out and you were able to heal yourself." She sat on the edge of the bed and smoothed the covers. "You guys are good friends right? He sure looked worried."

"Yes, we're pretty close." I imagined Gojyo's worried face.

"Lovers?" She blushed prettily.

"No, just friends." I wondered why most women I met thought I was gay.

"Ah, well then maybe I shouldn't tell you….but he was holding your hand, wouldn't let go and ah….he kissed you so sweetly when I told him you were going to be alright." She really was cute when she blushed.

"It's alright, he's like that."

"Oh, he didn't seem like the affectionate type, he didn't talk much."

"Really? Gojyo usually has lots to say." I touched lips as if I was trying to recall the feeling.

"Gojyo is the red head right?'

"Yes."

"He brought you here, but the blond chased him out. That's who I was talking about."

I was shocked. Sanzo stayed by me and kissed me in front of a stranger no less. "He's the one that shot me."

"Whatever for? Well that is none of my business." She patted my leg and stood. "I'll leave you to rest."

"Thank you for everything." I made myself comfortable and took a nap.

When I woke for the second time, I felt much better. My body had healed itself fully and I left with only a small scar. Oh well what's one more.

"Come on Doc. I've been a good boy so far, let me see him." Gojyo's voice had drifted down the hall and I smiled.

"Just for a few moments and no smoking you hear?"

"Yes ma'am." Gojyo popped his head in through doorway. "Hey buddy you're awake."

"Yes, thanks to you Gojyo. I'm sorry I caused such a fuss."

"Don't give me that sorry crap; it's the monk that should be sorry." He sat on the edge of the bed.

"No, I did something I should not have and he let me know my actions were not appreciated." I plucked at the blanket torn between telling Gojyo what really happened and keeping it to myself.

"Shit, but to fuckin' shoot you? What did you do kiss him?" He grabbed my hand. "That's it isn't?" He bent his head to look in my eyes. "Damn Kai, why him he's a cold hearted bastard."

"I don't honestly know Gojyo, but I think he needs me to care for him."

He sighed and pushed me over to make space for himself. "I always knew you were crazy, but to base a relationship on the fact that someone may need you, I might as well shack up with the monkey. He needs me to watch his back and keep him out of trouble.

"Well I have never been reasonable when love is concerned." I leaned against his bony shoulder. "But I'm sure we are done with all that, he made it very clear my attention is unwelcome."

"Yeah I would say the message is clear." He curled his fingers in mine. "Well ya still got me."

"I'm glad; I am very fond of you Gojyo." I rested my head on him and closed my eyes.

"This is fucking cute" Sanzo's irritated voice broke though my peace and quiet.

"Hey man, you don't have to be jealous." Gojyo tightened his grip. "There is enough Gojyo to go around." He smirked.

"Piss off kappa; I need to talk to him." He glared at the red head.

"Fine, I'll go make sure we can get you out of here Kai." He turned and kissed my cheek before he left.

"If that little scene was for my benefit, I'm not amused." He sat scowling at me.

"No Sanzo, Gojyo was just keeping me company." I folded my hands and watched him.

"Oh, I see" he sneered.

"That's just how he is; you should know that by now." I could tell he wanted to talk, but I didn't feel like making it easy for him. "He likes to show his affection in non lethal ways."

"I should have aimed for your head." He grumbled.

"Then who would drive?" I gave him by brightest smile.

"Shut up Hakkai. I want to tell you something and I'm only going to do this once." He moved to lock the door.

I smoothed my features and sat up. "I'm listening Sanzo."

"I'm sorry." He was leaning against the door with his head down. "I didn't want to hurt you."

"Apology accepted Sanzo. I'm fine now so all is forgiven."

He moved across the small room like he was stalking his prey. "You don't understand." He leaned over the bed, his leather clad arm brushing by hair as he held on to the head board. "Your rejection hurt me and then your kiss frightened me, I was confused and lashed out the only way I know how."

"I was foolish as well to think I could start a relationship while on this mission." I slowly raised my hand to his cheek.

"No, we could all die in the end." He actually leaned into my tentative touch.

"Very true."

"Hakkai, I…I'm not good at this." He let a small portion of the hard wall fall and I saw the look of a lonely, frightened man.

"I know" I brought his lips close to mine.

Sanzo stiffened and then after he realized I was not going to push, he relaxed. "I'm not a woman Hakkai; you don't need to treat me tenderly."

"I would never forget you are a man Sanzo, full of pride and stubbornness."

"And you are a demon full of tricks and half truths." He glared.

"You always knew that." I lay back on the pillow.

"I did and fell for you anyway." Sanzo almost smiled.

"Well, what should we do now?" I watched as he sat on the bed.

"Nothing, I won't get between you and the kappa. I should have kept my mouth shut and just left it alone." He sighed and stood. "I'm glad I didn't kill you."

I didn't want him to go, but I wasn't going to beg him to stay. There was so much he didn't understand. "Sanzo, about Gojyo and me…"

"Save it. I always knew you too were a little too close, even for best friends." He sneered at me.

"Believe what you want, but I care for you as well Sanzo." I knew he wouldn't understand the complexity of my relationship with Gojyo.

"Yeah, well I don't share; you need to make a choice Hakkai." He turned and almost ran in to Gojyo as he reentered the room.

"Whoa, sorry your holiness." He slipped past and stood at the end of the bed. "Doc says you are free to go."

"Good, I'm sure Sanzo is anxious to get back on the road." I stood and realized I was in just my underwear. "Oh, where are my clothes?"

"I'll get them." He stepped out and returned with them in a neat stack. "She washed them up and even stitched them for ya."

"Then will have to thank her." I pulled on my jeans and slipped the shirt over my head. As my head popped out of the top I noticed Gojyo looking intently at me. "Gojyo?"

He shook his head. "Sorry, I just was trying to figure out how he could stand over you and pull the trigger."

"He was very angry." I shrugged, how else could I explain it?

"Yeah so you've said." He put an arm around my shoulder.

We stopped to thank the doctor again and she patted my cheek. She blushed at the compliment Gojyo gave her and smiled as she noted his arm around me. He had shifted it to my waist and I let him play the protective lover, it seemed to make him happy.

On the way back to the inn, I thought about what Sanzo had said. I guess I needed to make a choice and stop acting like a fool. I could stay with Gojyo and in this odd relationship we have or choose Sanzo and maybe never know the love and closeness I crave, but did not deserve.

"Stop thinking so hard, you're giving me a headache." Gojyo had poked me in the ribs.

"I'm sorry. I was just thinking." I gave him a calm smile. "Let's get back to the hotel."

We walked back through town. Gojyo still had his arm around me and the town's folk noticed and either looked away or scowled. "Don't mind them they are just jealous cuz I got a beauty on my arm and they don't"

"Good lord Gojyo you are such a devious rake." I laughed and felt a little better.

We were met by Goku looking flustered. "He's gone; he got all pissed and took off."

"What? Gone where?" Gojyo let go of me and grabbed Goku.

"I don't know he was really pissed off and grumbled something about foolish people and stalked out." He was bouncing around agitated.

"You two search the town I'll head down by the river." I was worried for Sanzo. He was strong, but still a human. "Damn stubborn man." I cursed as I searched for our priest.


	2. Chapter 2

The river was wide, but slow moving. I ran swiftly, hoping to find

Sanzo. If Goku was having difficulty smelling our priest then he may be

in serious trouble. 'Foolish man taking off by himself just because he

was angry. Well of course, what else did expect from Sanzo…stubborn

man.' I grumbled as I ran.

I skidded to a halt when a surge of youkai chi hit the area hard. I

whipped around and ran up stream to find Sanzo bound in a strange web

like material and a large moth youkai hunched over him, clutching at the

sutra.

I hoped that Sanzo was unconscious and not dead for I didn't stop to

check. My main concern was the sutra as I rushed into the clearing

sending a blast of chi over Sanzo's prone body, hitting the youkai. It

turned it eyes on me and screeched. I stood my ground and began to fight

in earnest.

Its height made it slow and clumsy and I was able to doge his attacks

quite easily. It roared angrily and sent a plume of mist into the air. I

untied my novice wrap and secured it around my mouth and nose. The fine

powder stung my eyes but I continued to fight. It felt like hours of

hard fighting, but I blasted away at its defenses and slipped in,

severed its hand holding the sutra and shot my final blast through its

chest. It fell in a heap of wings and blood. I tucked the sutra in my

shirt against my skin and turning my back on the dead creature I ran to

Sanzo's side.

The creature's death caused the spell holding Sanzo to fade and he was

able to move. "Thank goodness you are alright Sanzo." I was slightly out

of breath.

"Where's the sutra?" His words were slow and almost slurred. The

creature must have poisoned him.

"Right here." I pressed it to his hand. In fact I was glad to get rid of

it; the sutra made my skin tingle.

A rustle behind me interrupted my thoughts. I stood to face thirty or so

youkai coming out of the woods. "Oh my Sanzo it looks like we have a bit

of a problem." I turned at the sound of Sanzo drawing his gun. "You are

still affected by the poison; let me take care of this."

He balanced himself against a tree and nodded. I was concerned about his

breathing, but had no time to help him. The youkai ringed the area and I

knew that if I used my chi on all of them I would be too depleted to

protect Sanzo properly.

I had to make my decision quickly. Reaching up to my limiters, I removed

them and shoved them into my pocket. I stretched my arms, flexed my

claws and tipped by head back to sniff the air as the power surged

through me.

'/Ah...loose at last; they hurt my priest now it time for them to hurt.'/

My youkai self took over and everything turned to brains and bones. The

delightful feel of skin ripping and the hot spray of blood made me want

more. I dove into the group and did my best. I felt myself grinning

madly and didn't care; it was good to be free.

I didn't gain some sort of control until I was standing close to Sanzo.

Blood and viscera dripped off my claws as I glazed at the man leaning

against the tree. He smelled so alive and powerful. _'You could take him_

_if you wanted to, it would be so easy._' I moved in close and the human

dared to point his gun at me.

"_Now, now Sanzo is that anyway to treat your rescuer?"_

"Back off Hakkai you're still blood lusting." He shifted his weight so

he could run.

"_Lusting yes, but I am well aware of myself. Don't run little priest_

_you may be fast, but I am much faster and stronger."_ The muscles

usually held in check by my limiters flexed in anticipation.

"Fuck you Hakkai, you come any closer and I will kill you this time."

The S&W wavered as he tried to hold up his drug weakened arm.

"_I'm sure you would. I just want a little taste Genjyo...something to_

_make this mess worth all my effort."_ I heard his heart beat speed up.

I moved against the gun and pushed him to the tree. _"I can smell your_

_arousal Genjyo don't deny it. You want me don't you?"_

"Stop saying my name like that. Hakkai, think about what you're doing.

Do not loose yourself in this madness." Sanzo looked into my eyes and I

felt a shiver run down my arms.

"_Madness?"_ I tried to shake of the reasonable side of myself as I

looked back into those violet eyes. "_I...Sanzo_."

He stood firm using his damn Buddhist power. "Give me your limiters

Hakkai." Sanzo touched my hand. "Give. Them. To. Me. Hakkai."

I growled at the touch, but handed them over_. "Kiss me Genjyo."_

"Damn it Hakkai." His lips were slightly chapped but felt divine.

I knew he was putting the limiters back on as he cradled my head. I

moaned at the loss of my stronger self. As my body shifted I fell to my

knees, wrapping my arms around Sanzo's thighs. "I'm so sorry."

He dropped to the ground as well. "I know Hakkai." Sanzo wiped a spot of

blood off his hand and scowled. "Shit my fucking head hurts."

"Let me help you." I forgot all about his wounds.

"No, I'm fine really just a bit of crappy ass poison." He tucked the gun

back in his robe. "Nothing some beer and aspirin won't fix."

"If you say so Sanzo. I should go wash up, I am getting you dirty." I

was able to stand shakily and wandered to the river. Stripping off my

bloody clothes, I tossed them in a heap on the shore. The water was

bitingly cold, but I welcomed it. I felt dirty as I always did after

'he' takes over. I submerged my head and stayed down as long as I

could then come up gasping.

"Ya know if you want to drown yourself you should do it where I can't

find you." Sanzo was knee deep in the water and stripped down to his jeans.

"I was just trying to get the blood out of my hair." I felt like a fool,

knowing what I said to Sanzo. "Should you really be in the water so soon

after being attacked?" He moved in closer to me and I panicked. "Are you

alright Sanzo? You don't need to worry yourself about me, you should

stay warm."

"Stop fussing, I'm fine. Besides I couldn't stand the monkey's yapping

so I came looking for you. You were gone for half an hour."

"Goku found you? Good, he was really worried about you. He said he

couldn't hear or smell you and you know how that upsets him" Sanzo was

now so close I could feel his body heat.

"Yes, he is like a damn leach sometimes. Anyway, I sent him and Gojyo

back to town to find a suitable hotel. I assumed you would want a warm

bath and a great deal of sake." He touched my shoulder where someone had

got in a good shot. "You should get out of the water and come back."

"Of course Sanzo. You are not angry with me for what I did?"

"What saving my ass and getting the sutra back while causing injury to

yourself? No, I'm not angry Hakkai." He slid his hand up from my wound

to my cheek.

"Yes well that's good, now could you move away….I'm not sure you want to

be so close to me Sanzo." I was fighting the after affects of the battle

and my youkai self.

"So it's back to Sanzo now is it? It was Genjyo an hour or so ago." His

voice was soft even though he had started shivering from the cold.

"Yes and an hour or so ago I was not myself." I moved towards the bank.

"Hakkai…. you were yourself earlier, maybe a little more true to your

real personality." Sanzo took my wrist in his cold fingers and tugged me

along behind him.

"Oh, so you think I'm a violent, blood lusting beast?" I pulled away

before the water level went below my waist.

He stood still with his wet jeans clinging to his slender thighs and I

stifled an appreciative sound. "Hakkai…I know exactly what you are. Now

get out before you freeze to death."

"I'm naked Sanzo." I don't know why I felt the need to tell him that.

"I assumed you were from the pile of clothing on the shore. I've seen

you naked before." He picked up his robe and slipped it on.

"Yes, I'm sorry." I exited the water and tried to get my jeans on over

my wet skin. My shirt stuck to my chest and I skipped the shoes

altogether. We walked back in silence until the town came into view.

"Sanzo may I ask you a question?"

"As long as it's not a stupid one." He looked at me with his usual glare.

"Why are you being so kind to me? I mean to say you were quite angry

with me when I left the healer's house." I stopped on the trail and

waited to see if he would even answer.

He stepped in front of me. "Maybe I'm feeling a bit grateful for the

help; you know how much the sutra means to me." His fingers tightened on

my belt loop.

I glanced at his hand and then into his eyes. "I do, but you know I am

bound to you and would do anything for you."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" He kept the venom in his voice

to a minimum.

"I simply mean you gave me a chance at another life, helped me try to

understand my true nature. I am bound to you by duty, death and love." I

leaned in closer trapping his hand against my stomach.

"Duty and death I understand, but don't spout that love crap to me,

we've had this discussion."

"No, you decided it would be easier to shoot me than deal with the idea

that I just may care for you." I made a bold move and wrapped my arm

around his waist. "Was I mistaken when I smelled your arousal earlier?"

Sanzo looked away and shook his head. "I can't help that my body reacts

on its own."

"Is it possible that your body knows more than you do? You said that my

youkai self is truer to the real me, maybe your body is truer than you

think." I figured if I was going to get punched I might as well make it

worth it. I cupped the back of his head and pressed my lips to his.

Sanzo stiffened but then to my surprise he let me kiss him deeper. He

kept his un-trapped hand at his side, but relaxed. I released him from

the kiss and searched his eyes for the violence that was to come. When

it didn't, I caressed his back.

"That was the first time I really had a chance to really see you in your

youkai form. Goku told me about it and I didn't quite believe him."

I was surprised at the turn of topics and stood speechless for a moment.

"More vile than you imagined?"

"No just the opposite, you were stunning, so much power and fluid

muscle." Sanzo looked as if he was uncomfortable with reveling so much.

"So that's why you reacted as you did, I understand." I let him go and

turned away. If he desired me just because I was a strong efficient

killer, I didn't want to bother him with my limited self.

"I don't think you do Hakkai. I have always understood on a basic level

what you were capable of and really didn't give a damn. Although today I

learned I really had no real idea as to the full scope of your power.

You must believe all that love shit you keep talking about because you

rushed in like a fool unconcerned with your own safety and saved my

sorry ass. Just the fact that you willingly removed your limiters and

killed all those youkai…well…fuck I have no idea where I'm going with

this…but then the way you said my name. Shit Hakkai."

I have never seen Sanzo so unsure. "It's alright; you don't have to say

anything else." I stepped away from him and changed the subject to one

less intense. "Friends then, no more shooting?"

He shook his head. "Hmpf, friends it is then until you decide otherwise.

I've had time to make peace with how I feel. Like I said before you need

to make the choice, I won't make it for you." He lit a cigarette and

began walking again.

"When you have the patients I will tell you about Gojyo and me." I

thought he should know of how I felt about my best friend.

"Fine, just don't give me any details."

"I have already told you it's not like that. If you and I are even

thinking of moving forward it's best to have an understanding of our

relationship." I looked at him.

"Fine I said"

"Alright Sanzo, maybe after we have cleaned up I could come to your room

and talk?" My heart felt lighter already.

"No"

"Oh." I sagged a little.

"We're rooming together. I told Gojyo I needed to speak with you."

"Oh dear, and let me guess a night with the Gold Card was the reward for

our kappa to agree?" I chuckled to myself thinking of the conversation.

"Fuck, he's a pain in the ass, hentai kappa." He grumbled.

"That's Gojyo, walking carnality." I walked faster now that the inn was

a few yards away.

Within an hour I was fed, showered and pushed into a large soaking tub.

I leaned back and closed my eyes letting the water soak away the stress

and soreness. Goku had brought by some sake as a reward for 'saving'

Sanzo and stayed to chat for a moment then left me alone with my

thoughts. But before I could dig too deep into that maze of confusion,

the door was opened and a familiar red head popped in.

"Did ya hear my reward for being a good boy and letting Sanzo room with

ya?" He began stripping and I cocked my head in his direction.

"I assume you are joining me?"

"Sure may be the last time I get to hang with you like this...ya know

with Sanzo being so serious about ya now." He eased in across from me

and stretched his long legs next to my hip. We sat in comfortable

silence, letting the water swirl around tired bodies.

I watched him close his eyes and stretch his arms over his head. "Gojyo

he can't stop us from being friends, you know that." I ran my fingers

along his ankle.

"I know, I just meant he will shoot me if he finds me...how did he put

it? "Touching Hakkai in an over familiar way" Damn monk is trying to

take away all my fun." He nudged me with his foot. "I thought you said

he didn't want anything to do with you?"

"Yes, well we have an understanding now, no shooting." I smiled and

tickled his leg.

"As long as it makes you happy that's cool. I've never had illusions

about us. You and I are too fucked up to make each other truly happy in

the long run, not that the monk isn't any better; but hey as long as I

get a bit of Hakkai time I'm fine with it." Gojyo sat up and leaned in

close pinning me to the side of the tub. "But if he hurts you again I

will kill him."

"I know Gojyo, I know." I brought his lips to mine for a gentle chaste

kiss. "I am very grateful for your friendship."

He gave me a cocky smile and licked my lips. "Yeah me too, but damn the

sex would have been great between us."

I pushed him a way with a laugh. "I'm sure it would have you rouge."

"You know it. Now I seem to hear a certain little card calling my name,

it's saying…Gojyo come play there are so many lonely girls down here."

He climbed out and wrapped a towel around his waist. "Can't ignore it or

there could be trouble."

"And we wouldn't want that." I shook my head in amusement.

"Hell no." He turned a serious face to me. "Don't let your heart get

broken again Hakkai."

"I won't. Now go before all the good ones are taken." I shooed him out.

The bath relaxed me slightly and made my wounds stop throbbing. I dried

and dressed in the jeans and black button up dress shirt Goku had left

for me. I knocked on the door to the room I would be sharing with Sanzo.

Sanzo was sitting on the bed reading. I entered and sat down by his

feet. He seemed to have fully recovered from the attack and by the look

of his hair he had a chance to shower as well. "Thank you for the chance

to bathe, I feel much better now. Besides it gave me a chance to speak

with Gojyo."

"Yeah and?" He folded the paper and set it on the floor.

"And nothing, like I said before we do not have a sexual relationship."

I folded my hands in my lap so I would not be tempted to touch him.

"Could have fooled me." Sanzo sat up and leaned closer to me, his weight

felt good against my shoulder.

"Sanzo much as I would like to touch you right now, I don't think it

would be wise. I still feel a little wound up from being in my youkai

form for several hours."

He brought my lips close to his. "I don't care if you're a little rough;

I just want to touch you."

"Isn't that rushing things a little?" I stood up and moved to the other bed.

"Ever since we got back all I could think about was how you looked wet

and naked. It pisses me off that you won't get out of my fucking head. I

hoped that if I touched you and got it out of my system, that it would

go away. I'm not real comfortable about the whole man on man thing, but

fuck it…. I know I need to feel your skin against mine." Sanzo sounded

so calm.

"Go ahead I won't stop you." I lay on my back and folded my hands under

my head, letting him take the lead for now.

He sat down next to me and unbuttoned my shirt. His fingers hesitated a

moment before he laid his palm in the middle of my chest. I assumed

Sanzo would be more aggressive like he is with most everything else, but

he was really quite gentle.

Sanzo traced the outlines of my muscles and ribs, but stayed away from

my scar. "You're softer than I expected, but it's not like I have

touched a lot of different skin…Goku's mostly."

I nodded, letting a sigh escape my lips as he brushed over my nipple.

"Do that again Sanzo."

He gave me a smirk that bordered on seductive. "You still think we

should be just friends Hakkai?"

"Mmm, right now I really hope not." I arched into his touch to let him

know I wanted more, but I wasn't going to take more than Sanzo was

willing to give.

"Is that so? What if I decide I want to stop?" He ghosted his lips over

my collar bone.

"Ah...a...then we would stop and have a stiff drink to calm our nerves." I

griped the sheets to keep my hands from pulling him down on top of me.

"You are so full of shit Hakkai, like you could stop now." Sanzo inched

his mouth up along my throat and nipped me gently, but in a manner that

told me he wanted to be the dominate one.

"I have more self control than you give me credit for. If you are

uncomfortable I can stop this right now." I turned my head and hoped his

lips continued their path.

"I'm uncomfortable, but not in the way you think." He unpeeled my hand

and placed it on the bulge in his jeans.

My eyes snapped up to his and then down to my hand. "Gods Sanzo" I heard

my breathy, wanting voice, but didn't stop to think how needy it made me

seem.

He finally allowed me to pull him fully on the bed and press my body to

his. He tensed at the contact and his breath quickened. "Not so fast...if

I wanted a quick fuck I would have asked the kappa."

"Such language Sanzo, trust me I'm not ready to go any faster than you

want." He allowed me to slip my hand under his shirt and caress his

back. I could feel old scars and a few new wounds from earlier.

"Just shut the fuck up and let me do this." He tried to sound grumpy,

but it didn't have the same affect when he pressed into my hip.

"Alright, I'm all yours." I rolled us both to so we lay face to face on

our sides. He allowed me to run my hands though his hair.

Sanzo quickly unzipped my pants and then his. He looked up and crushed

his lips to mine. He held my lip in his teeth before flicking his tongue

over it.

I could barely process normal thoughts after that kiss. All my plans to

carefully seduce Sanzo melted away along with any doubts about my

feelings. Soon everything turned to heat and moans. I reached between

our bodies and released our erections. "Ah..Sanzo" I sighed as I pressed

them together and began slowly stroking us both.

"Shit." Sanzo hissed and I attacked his throat with nips and kisses.

"Faster…Hakkai."

I was lost in our mutual pleasure and stroked us faster. His fingers dug

into my arm and curled in my hair. I wanted to close my eyes to focus on

my building orgasm. But Sanzo's eyes were so close I was captured by

them. "Sanzo…oh gods."

"Mmm...yeah...almost." His thighs trembled and he arched into my touch.

"Fuuucck." He growled out.

A hot splash over my fingers and stomach gave me that little push and I

fell hard. My seed joined Sanzo's on my skin. I moved my fingers over

sensitive skin as we rode out the after shocks. I panted with my lips

pressed against his shoulder.

"Let me get something to clean us up with." I reluctantly moved from his

side and went to wash. I brought back a wet cloth and gave it to Sanzo.

He had tucked himself back into his boxers, but left his jeans open. My

eyes were drawn to his still half hard cock and I wet my lips.

He raised an eyebrow and lit a cigarette. "Now don't think just because

I let you touch me that I want you fussing with me all the time." Sanzo

flicked his ash out the open window.

"Of course not. You should know I am very capable of keeping my hands to

myself. Besides the last thing I want is to try and explain our

relationship to Goku." I lay back down on my stomach to watch Sanzo

smoke. His hair was tousled and cheeks still a little flush making him

more handsome.

"Relationship? Is that what you think this is?" He scowled at me.

"I would never assume anything with you Sanzo. I'll take what you are

willing to give and be content with it."

"That's typical of you Hakkai. Why don't you take what you want? Is that

why you never told Gojyo you are in love with him; you are always

willing to play the martyr."

"It's not that, he's not ready for the burden of my affection." I knew I

would have to convince Sanzo this was more than a fleeting crush I felt

for him, but not today. I'll let what we did sink in for him and then

see where it takes us.

"And I am?" Sanzo walked back to the bed and sat down.

"I think you are, but I also know not to push you, so I won't. Nothing

has to change between us Sanzo."

"If you say so." He looked at me and it made me shiver.

"I do. I've made my choice if you will allow it." I reached out and put

a hand on his shoulder.

"I will." He covered my hand with his briefly. "Now let's go feed the

monkey before he comes in whining."

"Yes that would be best, would hate for the poor boy to expire in the

hallway." I gave Sanzo a wink and stood up.


	3. Chapter 3

I know it's been a while since I updated, but I hope you like it .Still no beta so all the screw ups are mine…. And the usual disclaimer bullshit applies.

"Stop worrying Hakkai he will be fine." A gruff voice interrupted my thoughts.

"I know, it's just I never expected the youkai to toss a spike strip in front of Hakaryuu. I guess he just needs to rest Sanzo." I stroked my dragon friend's head and made sure he wasn't feverish.

"Why don't you go to town and get the supplies and I'll keep watch." My monk volunteered.

I looked at him and then nodded. "I suppose it would be best. I'll take Goku with me. I think he's tired of hanging out with Gojyo."

I gathered my list and the gold card then went to find Goku. The young man was in the dinning room finishing off his lunch. "Hello Goku, want to help me shop?"

He cocked his head and smiled. "Sure, not much else happening and Gojyo is off with some bakery girl."

I kept to my list and tried not to let my thoughts stray back to Hakaryuu. Goku was uncommonly quiet and I stopped at a bench, putting the bags down. "Are you alright Goku?"

He sat next to me and fidgeted before he spoke. "Sanzo is different since he shot you and I don't know if I like it or not."

"What do you mean? He seems the same to me." I dreaded this conversation, yet was glad to finally get it out in the open.

"He's not as grumpy and doesn't fuss when I want to share the room with him. I know something is going on between you two, but just not what exactly."

"Not much is going on Goku at least not in the way you may think." I leaned back against the bench and thought about how long it had been since I touched Sanzo. "Are you angry with me?"

He scooted closer. "Not really...I just...I don't know Hakkai."

"Maybe a little jealous, I would understand if you were. Sanzo was yours so to speak before I came into the picture." I turned to him and hoped what I was going to say wouldn't ruin our friendship. "I can't help that I have fallen for Sanzo."

He looked at me for a long time, his golden eyes held me in my place. "Jealous...maybe but not because I want to kiss him or have sex with him like you. I love Sanzo a lot and would do anything for him, but he's like a foster father to me, well maybe like a mentor or something. Look Hakkai, if you want to love him fine, but I belong with Sanzo; I can't just let you have him." Goku stood with his hands on his hips looking down at me as if he wanted to fight.

"Well I don't think you have a choice in the matter Goku." I stood up and gave him a stern look. "Sanzo is the one to make that decision, he belongs to no one."

"You just can't handle the fact that I love him more. Damn it Hakkai, I can't lose the only person I love." He shouted at me.

"You won't loose him, it's not like I plan on hurting him." I understood his fear.

He pushed me against the side of a shop and snarled at me. "You have already proven you can't keep the one you love safe, how can I trust you with Sanzo's life?"

"How dare you." The anger boiled in my stomach. "I have kept him safe so far on this little trip, I think I can manage a bit longer." I pushed away from him.

"You think so? " His golden eyes were bright with anger and something more primal.

"Yes I do. I am quite capable Goku." I turned and left him to fume on the sidewalk. I could feel the anger directed at me.

I walked back to the inn my mind in turmoil. I didn't want to fight with Goku nor did I want to give up the fragile relationship with Sanzo. Although I didn't really have much say in what Sanzo wanted, the man was stubborn. Before I stomped into the hotel I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself. I managed to reduce my pulse and felt a little more like myself.

When I walked into the room I was greeted by an amusing sight. Sanzo was asleep on his back with Hakaryuu tucked under his arm. I sat the groceries down and quietly gathered up the laundry. Being the leader's semi lover did not exempt me from my duties, much to my chagrin.

"He's been out ever since you left." A sleepy voice made me look up.

Sanzo was so handsome with his rumpled hair and cheeks flush from sleep. "Good and from the looks of it so have you." I sat on the bed and felt the soft dragon fur. "He seems to be fine now. I wasn't sure if I should have used my chi to heal him."

"Looks like he will be well enough to go in a few days I suppose." He shifted slightly and Hakaryuu whined in his sleep at the loss of body heat. "Greedy bastard does that every time I move."

"He wants your heat Sanzo." I gave him a small smile. "I'll go do laundry and bring some dinner back. I would like to spend a quiet evening with him."

He shifted on the bed to a half lounge. "Get some sake too, if I have to listen to you fuss like a mother hen over your dragon at least I can do it comfortably buzzed."

"Of course Sanzo, I won't be too long." Gathering up the items, I turned to the door.

"Stay out of trouble. Whatever happened earlier with Goku has got your youkai power up and I don't want to have to explain to the heads why you went crazy in some backwater town." He was sitting up now with Hakaryuu in his lap.

I turned to look at him. "Nothing happened with Goku, we just had a small disagreement, and I'll be fine."

He let the dragon curl up on the bed and stood in front of me. "A little disagreement? Your energy is fucking giving me a head ache. What did you two talk about?"

"Goku merely expressed his unwillingness to let me be with you. I explained that I was not the one to decide that it was up to you, but I also told him that I would not step aside."

Sanzo shook his head and slipped out of his robe. "I'll speak with him; he will listen to me without the dumbass jealousy shit between you two. I don't belong to either of you…remember that Hakkai." He ran his fingers down my chest.

"I knew from the moment I met you, you would never belong to anyone but yourself. You are a strong, stubborn man and I had no illusions about us from the instant our lips touched." I leaned into his hand.

"I think that's why I like you." He moved his rough fingers up to my cheek and into my hair. "You are, for the most part, a smart man."

"Sanzo" I tipped my head slightly keeping my eyes locked on his violet ones. "Please, let me go do the laundry, I need time to stabilize my energy."

"No, come here I'll fix it." He pulled my mouth close to his. "You may have your chi, but this works too. Now keep still I don't do this for just anyone." His voice was low, but commanding.

I didn't move when I felt the tickle of power lick at my mind. I tried to fight it out of instinct but Sanzo pushed harder and I let him in. My knees buckled and he followed me to the floor. I could barely hear him chanting above the roaring in my ears.

The room disappeared and I found myself in a patch of high grass, just like the one near my old house. My muscles remembered the soft patch of clover I would lie on after my students left for the day. I breathed in the cool, fresh air tinted with the tang of hay. The sun warmed my face and I heard a soothing voice telling me to relax deeper. I followed the sound and eased into a light trance. Memories of happiness passed through my mind. Gojyo and his warm smile, Goku struggling with his homework, and Sanzo my strong handsome priest closing his eyes as he neared orgasm. The sky shifted and Kanan stood over me and I smile up at her as I once did long ago. Her hair glowed with the setting sun behind her and I smiled at the angelic image, but then she faded into a rotting corpse and I screamed. The knife was in my hand and blood splashed up into my mouth. I slashed and slashed loosing my sense of self with each life I took. Now my muscles remembered something so much more terrible and they ached with overuse. I stumbled down the stairs; I tensed and reached out to find something to catch me from falling. The chill of cold steel brought me back to awareness and I lay panting. Slowly I opened my eyes, finding violet ones focused on me. "I'm sorry Sanzo."

I realized I had my fist buried in Sanzo's shirt and the other wrapped around the barrel of the Smith and Wesson. "No I should be the one apologizing. All I wanted was to help you get yourself under control. I didn't realize my power would wake memories that you have worked hard to bury."

I released the tight black shirt and eased back from the gun. "Was I that out of control that you needed your weapon?" I tried to sit up, but Sanzo held me down.

"You had almost forced your youkai self to the surface without taking off your limiters. Your vines tried to fucking choke me, so I pulled my gun." He seemed a little shaken by the ordeal.

"I am so sorry Sanzo." I managed to get up and walked a little unsteadily to the bed. "I know you only meant to help, but please I need to be alone."

"Like hell. After shit like that, you being alone is not a good idea." He sat down next to me and pushed me back to lie on the bed.

I simply did not have the strength to fight him. He was looking down at me with an odd expression. "It was really like that? In the castle I mean...all that blood and anger."

"I'm afraid so." I rolled away from him so he couldn't see the pain I know showed in my eyes. "I think I'll just rest for a little while."

Sanzo put his hand on my back and sighed. "I was foolish for thinking I could treat you the same way as Goku, it won't happen again."

"It's alright Sanzo, it started out quite nice." I kicked off my shoes and reached up to loosen my tunic fastenings, but my fingers shook too much.

"Stop baka, let me do it." Sanzo batted my hands away and I rolled to my back so he could reach the fastenings. "Shit you are shaking Hakkai."

"Ah yes well it was quite upsetting." I sighed and let Sanzo loosen my shirt. He pushed my tunic up and I lifted my arms. "Sanzo?"

"Shh...let me do this." He ghosted his finger tips over my scar. "Let me help you forget the horrors just for a little while."

Once Sanzo decided to let go of his stubborn pride he was quite passionate in bed. It had been several weeks since we were together and our kisses were wild and desperate. I needed to feel more of his body and it was evident he felt the same. He clawed at my back and pulled hair anxious for me to enter him.

Our bodies found a rhythm that was old as time. We were both broken men looking for something to heal our wounds and together I believe we had the means to do so. Sanzo was beautiful in his submissiveness and I took full advantage of that. I took my time making sure he felt completely sated in all ways before I pushed us both to the edge to reach our completion.

I bent over Sanzo's back, stroking him fast. I was rewarded with a splash of warmth and his body tensing around me. I thrust in a few more times and as I found my own ecstasy I bit down on his shoulder. He moaned under me and I shivered with the last of my orgasm.

"Fuck Goku."

I thought I misheard and looked up to find the boy was standing in the room leaning on the closed door eyes wide and breathing hard. I didn't let go of Sanzo, instead I gave a possessive growl and locked eyes with Goku's golden ones.

"Hakkai let me go." Sanzo pushed me slightly and I released my teeth from his shoulder and slipped from his body.

I sat back on my heels to catch my breath. "Alright I'll go take a shower." I walked naked to the bathroom uncaring what Goku thought.

I heard Sanzo pull a blanket around him before I turned on the water. I slowly washed my hair and body, trying to drown out the raised voices and my own racing thoughts. I dried and tugged on a pair of jeans before I returned to the room.

"Sanzo you know I love you." Goku's voice sounded wounded.

"I know kid, but it's not the same thing as what Hakkai means when he says it to me. You love me as a foster father and that's fine, I'm stuck with you anyway. But Hakkai… he says it in a way that means so much more."

I froze listening to Sanzo and Goku talk. I know I shouldn't eavesdrop, but the curiosity got the best of me. I never thought that Sanzo would talk to Goku that way; patient and almost fatherly.

"That's what he said too, but I still fought with him. Now I sort of feel bad about bring her up when I yelled at him."

"You what? Damn it no wonder he freaked out on me. Don't you know that some things are better left alone? Your past alone should give you a clue monkey." Sanzo shouted.

"I know..I was just so upset." I heard him flop on the bed.

"Fuck…well what's done is done; I just hope you two can fix things between you. I do not want to be in the middle of your childish shit." The bed creaked and I knew Sanzo had gotten up. "I'm taking a shower..don't be stupid Goku."

"Alright."

I moved out of the way. "All yours Sanzo."

"That goes for you too." He leaned in, our bodies barely touching. "I'll make sure he understands later, right now he's calmed down and not too upset about catching us in bed."

"Yes, I understand Sanzo." I let my fingers linger on his ribs as I passed.

He snorted and shut the bathroom door. The water turned on and I heard the stall door slide shut. I took a seat on the other bed and dried my hair. I tried to ignore Goku for the moment, knowing the questions would start soon. I folded my towel and set to combing my unruly hair.

"It really feels that good? I mean the sounds Sanzo was making when..ah you.."

"That is none of your business Goku. What two people do in the privacy of the bedroom is for them alone." I sighed and sat next to the younger man. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to snap. You just surprised me; I guess we should have locked the door."

"Yeah, it was a little weird seeing you guys like that…I mean" He shook his head. "I can't unsee it now."

"No you can't." I turned and looked at the flustered boy.

"Hakkai…I'm really sorry I made you freak out and that we fought about stupid stuff." He tucked his hands in his lap. "But I am going to make Sanzo explain to me what..what sex it's all about."

"Good luck with that one Goku." I was relived that he didn't want to argue with me about Sanzo any longer.

"Or you could show me..like you did Sanzo..cuz I know he's never done it before and you had to show him how…so how bout showing me too." He said in a rush.

"Absolutely not Saru!" Sanzo saved me from answering by coming out of the bathroom.

"Aww Sanzo why not?" He whined reminding me that he truly was innocent still when it came to some matters in life.

"Because no one wants to have sex with a hungry monkey." He said offhandedly and dropped his towel to pull on his jeans.

"Fine I'll ask Gojyo, he's not picky." He stomped out and slammed the door.

"Great, just fucking great." Sanzo grabbed his cigarettes and lit one. "Now Gojyo will know all about it as well. I'll never hear the end of the virgin wise cracks." He lay back and blew the smoke to the ceiling.

I lay down next to him and took the smoke from his fingers, taking a drag. "Don't worry about it Sanzo if he says anything I'll remind him of a few things he would rather have forgotten." He rolled towards me and took the cigarette back.

"Yeah well still." He scowled.

"So you really were a virgin Sanzo? I mean it was hard to tell the way you just seemed to know what to do our first time together." His skin was still damp and warm from his shower and I let my fingers wander over his stomach since he wasn't stopping me.

"I told you I wasn't real sure about the man on man thing. And well it wasn't like I really cared much one way or the other or had anyone in mind, though I would have given my body to Koumyou if he asked." He finished quietly.

"I understand and I appreciate the gift you have given me." I dared not snuggle my prickly priest so I contented myself with a quick kiss to his chest before I sat up.

"Yeah whatever don't go getting all romantic on me I will have to shoot you again." There was a smirk in the comment.

"Right, right." I opened the door. "I think I need to warn Gojyo about Goku though he my just take your young ward up on his offer."

"He better fucking not, I will start shooting." He grumbled half heartedly.

"Of course it may do the boy good." I knew I was pushing his buttons, but it made me smile.

Sanzo sat up and glared. "No it wouldn't, if he absolutely needs to be taught then it should be someone that won't treat him like just another conquest."

That statement piqued my curiosity. "And that would be you I assume?" I turned back to the bed. "I'm not sure that would be wise."

"Why because you are a possessive son of a bitch?" Sanzo smirked.

"Precisely."

"Ah, then it would have to be both of us or just you then." He gave me a challenging look.

"I think this conversation has turned a bit odd for both of us. I will go do the laundry now and stop by Gojyo's room."

"Do as you want, but I know you will dwell on the idea." He found his paper and flipped it open.

"Maybe."


End file.
